The Holidays

The holidays are approaching with all of the noise and clatter of a freight train. If advertisements on TV and in the Sunday newspapers are any indication, this year promises to be one in which commercial interests spare no expense and hold back no tactic to separate us from our money.
That’s the part of the season that I don’t like.
If one looks beneath the surface, however, there is a part of the season that I and many others do like. This is the part where families come together and renew ties, carry on traditions, and welcome new members. This is the part of the season that holds interest for me and is by far, I think, the more important.
Yes, I know that some families can’t get along when they come together. And I also know that for some families, seeing other family members only brings out memories that are less than pleasant. It is also true that many families cannot be together due to separation, either forced or voluntary, and the holidays just aren’t the same because of it.
Sometimes family gatherings are an exercise in high-level diplomacy as hosts have to determine whether to invite this ex spouse or that estranged child or some other relative who has or causes issues and problems for others.
The intact family, free of divorce, abuse, drug use (including alcoholism), or feuding is increasingly rare and is no longer the norm. The holidays, while for many are a time of joy, are for many more a time of trial and tribulation, of tempest and tumult, of turmoil and turbulence.
It takes work to keep family gatherings peaceful and fun. It takes work to make family gatherings something to long for instead of dread. All who gather play a part and all who gather are responsible for their actions and attitudes.
Leave the political and religious discussions at home. Leave the booze at home. And leave your hyped-up ego, your bluster, your anger, your payback schemes, and your gossip at home. Just enjoy yourself and work diligently to make it so others have the opportunity to do the same.
Above all, remember why these two holidays exist. Even if you aren’t religious, you can be thankful for what you have and you can enjoy the spirit of giving. You can get out of yourself for just a few minutes and think about others. And you can enjoy this time as it was meant to be enjoyed.