We're All Getting There

Have you noticed, when you drive on a busy road or multi-lane freeway of some kind (Kellogg Ave is a good example here in Wichita), how people behave when they drive?  And that you, if you are observant, can pretty much tell what someone will do in a given situation even though you don’t know that person?

For example, let’s suppose you are driving on a four lane road, in the left lane, and someone ahead of you slows down and signals a left turn.  They have to wait for oncoming traffic, so they stop.  Two or three people who have been in the right hand lane for some time go on around the person stopped to make a turn.  Those people probably will: (a) stay in the right hand lane after they pass the stopped car, or (b) turn into the left hand lane after they pass the stopped car.

You know the answer as well as I.  They most likely will move into the left hand lane, speed up some, and enjoy the “emptiness” of that lane, even if they have to go back to the right lane in a short time to make a turn.

Let’s try another one.  You are in the middle lane of Kellogg Avenue, a six-lane freeway.  There is moderate traffic around you, but your lane ahead of you is clear for about ¼ mile or so.  A vehicle has been behind you for some time, going about your speed.  He has had several opportunities to pass around you in another lane, but has chosen to not do that.  You assume he is happy going about the same speed you are traveling, and things are fine.
You get to the place where you need to get into the right lane to make a turn off after awhile.  You do.  What will the car behind you do?  (a) Keep going the same speed, or (b) speed up until he takes up the empty space ahead of him.

Again, you know the answer.  Most likely, he’ll speed up until he comes up behind the traffic ahead of him, then slow down again.

My guess is that 8 times out of 10, these things happen just as I described.  So why are people so predictable?  What is it about people that makes them do these things?  My guess is that when you’ve figured out why YOU like to also do these things, you will have found out why all the others like to do them as well.  Because when YOU are in these positions, you like to do the very same things in the same ways I described, don’t you.  I know I do.

My own unprofessional opinions of the situations above are of no concern, although I do think the scenarios have something to do with superiority, control, and a sense of self and entitlement.  These quirks in our driving habits betray our nastier selves, sometimes, and these situations are “acceptable” ways to do that.  Just as beating the light, racing to get ahead of someone at the “on” ramp, or changing lanes in front of someone rather than behind someone are ways we ding at and get our superiority jollies at the expense of others.

And I think that the older we get, for the most part, the less important those things are to us.  Which may well be why older people seem to take forever to do the things that make the rest of us nuts.  They still write checks at the supermarket, for Pete’s sake, and don’t start to make out the check until all the groceries have been rung up and totaled, and they’ve regaled the poor cashier with the story of how they found their false teeth this morning after losing them the day before.  They move very slowly when pulling into a parking space, or backing out of one.  They take up the entire width of the corridor with their canes and walkers, not thinking about the traffic jam behind them croaking from having to wait.

I’m getting there myself.  I’ve joined the International Society of Curmudgeons and have my framed certificate of membership hanging on my office wall.  It has become my pride and joy because now I can just point to the certificate when someone dings on me about being slow or disrupting the smooth flow of something.  That certificate answers all questions and brings about the silence I so much enjoy.  And they know that I’ll not change just for them, nor will I even care that they are so worked up about my impeding something they thought was so important.  It’s like they’re talking to the wall, and when they see the certificate, they know that won’t likely change any time soon.

And if you’re one of those who are put off by people driving only the speed limit or wanting to make a left turn, or someone paying by check, just remember that you’re on that march to older age too.  One day, you’ll get there and you’ll have your own curmudgeon certificate that you can use to snub your nose to the world…and that will be a wonderful day.