"Be the First Kid On Your Block!"

Are you mature enough to recall the old cereal commercials that had, somewhere within them, “Be the first kid on your block”?  Invariably, that comment was in regard to some toy or gizmo you could send in twenty-five cents (no stamps, please) and two box tops to get, or came already packaged somewhere inside the cereal box.  Usually, it was made of plastic or some kind of construction paper or cardboard, and lasted all of about ten minutes before something on it broke or otherwise became inoperable.

I was reminded of that phrase this weekend.  We had company in our home for a few days, so when I went to the store, I picked up several different kinds of cereal besides the ONE kind the wife and I eat.  I figured they might not care for spoon-size shredded wheat each morning, and might want something different.

When we opened one of the boxes and poured out some cereal, out came a plastic thingy wrapped in more plastic.  It took the wife unwrapping it and looking on the box to determine that it was a Sponge Bob water shooter.  Evidently, you fill the thing with about three teaspoons of water and then push the plunger.  The water shoots out a hole in the other end, ostensibly getting someone wet.

We haven’t tried it yet.  It’s laying on the pie safe in the dining area.  (Why do they call it a pie safe?  We haven’t EVER stored pies in ours…)  I admit I was tempted to stand out in our front yard with the thing and yell at the top of my lungs that I was the first kid on my block to have one.  But with my luck, a neighbor kid would come out of his or her house with a giant version of the same thing and give me a quick shower just to show me that they had one before I did.

When I was a kid, I wasn’t really sure what “my block” even was.  We lived in an unplatted part of the town.  That means that there were no streets and lots platted.  We owned about two and a half acres, and there were two or three other houses in the same unplatted area.  The place where the street (Adams Street, by the way, for those who know my home town) would have gone had there been a platted street was right through our front driveway and garage.  So I was always a little ambivalent about just who and what constituted my block.  Besides, most of the kids who were within a block or so of me didn’t care about things such as that anyway.  We were more concerned with finding crawdads, lizards, and snakes down at the drain ditch, watching the train come to bring or take cars to or from the neighboring grain elevator, or playing at the old, abandoned house we owned on part of that acreage.

Those were the days when our mothers would toss us out the door sometime in the earlier morning and call us back in for lunch (we called it dinner); then toss us out again until supper time.  Our family had a bell mounted on a pole outside that we could hear from two or three blocks away.  And when we heard it, we knew we were supposed to hightail it home.  Blocks really didn’t mean much to us back then, and the concept of child kidnapping never occurred to anyone…least of all us.  We’d use the nearest bathroom, which often was a tree, the drain ditch, or inside the barn on our property.  And once in a while, someone’s mom would poke her head out the door just to be sure no one was dead or had suffered an amputation of some kind.

“Be the first kid on your block!”  I like all the memories that come with that.  Hopefully, you have such memories as well.

Well, huh.

I was putting away laundry a few days ago when I rather innocently took a brief look at the tag in the waistband of a pair of briefs…you know, underwear.  I didn’t think much about it because a guy’s gotta look somewhere.  But then after a few seconds, it hit me.  There’s a URL on the tag in the waistband of my briefs.  I took another look and sure enough.  www.hanes.com/briefs was in sorta fine print at the bottom of the tag.

I wondered, “Why would anyone want to look at a webpage for men’s underwear?”  And then I thought, “Isn’t anything sacred anymore?  Does everything have to have a URL plastered on it?”  I went ahead and put away the “offensive” briefs along with socks and other assorted men’s items, and went about my business.

But the URL for underwear stayed in my head, and I finally today succumbed to the temptation.  I typed the URL into FireFox and lo and behold, there it was!  Of course, the first page didn’t really have much except a little introductory material and a couple of boxes where you could click if you were interested in boys or men.  I presume they meant boy’s underwear or men’s underwear instead of something more dark and sinister, and clicked on men.  And there they were!

There was the classic underwear.  There were tagless briefs.  There were “comfort blend” briefs.  There were briefs with the comfort flex waistband.  And briefs with the comfort soft waistband.  There were dyed briefs.  There were mid-rise briefs, sport briefs, and even boxer briefs (I have a nephew that may like those…).  Oh, and if you clicked on one of the pictures, you could get a larger view, as if that somehow would determine what you ordered.

And you could order any or all of these right on the web site.  No need to go to Wal Mart, Dillards, or some real store.  Just order in the comfort of your home and have ‘em delivered.  Of course, until they ARE delivered, you have to wear your old, worn out Fruit-Of-The-Looms and can’t take advantage of the latest tagless black sports brief with the comfort flex waistband and comfort blend material.  But they are certainly worth the wait, aren’t they?

Now, don’t get me wrong.  I order stuff on line.  Maybe not underwear, but I have accounts with several on-line outfits, and order things there somewhat readily.  However, I usually order only the stuff I can’t get here.  I’ve not normally found that on line ordering is cheaper, but I’ve never been unsatisfied with something I’ve ordered, either.

So, I guess this is fair notice to me that URL’s can and will appear anywhere, anytime.  Just like the little boxes called QR codes that whisk one to a web site and that show up anywhere, URL’s can and do appear in places not often thought of as places to look for them.  Well, huh.

All the Tea in China

Well, I suppose I need to take the pledge.  No, no, not THAT one!  I’m talking about the no-political-comments-on-Facebook pledge.  You see, I have a lot of conservative friends.  And I am finding myself not quite in agreement with them sometimes.  One of the things I do not like is the tendency to get personal…calling candidates names…posting things that are only half true that were dredged up from some talking head web site.

Yes, I know, I’ve been guilty of some of that.  And I repent in dust and ashes.  My sister, bless her heart, has taken a one month sabbatical from Facebook all together.  She’s due to come back on October 1.  She’s a brave woman…for coming back after having the peace of not having to deal with some of what goes on there.

So, henceforth, I will do my best to shut my mouth (figuratively speaking) when faced with the prospect of posting something political in nature on my wall.  I do not promise to entirely refrain from posting a comment on someone else’s post, but will try to limit that as much as possible.

You see, it is so easy to say things on Facebook that just aren’t in accord with the plain teaching I find in the Bible.  I won’t bore you with references.  Suffice it to say that our speech, if we are Christ-followers, is to be “with grace,” “seasoned, as it were, with salt,” and is to be spoken “in love.”  We are to respect others, honor those in authority over us, and love our neighbor (everyone besides ourselves) as we do ourselves.  We are to watch diligently that we don’t let our tongues get the best of us.  Our tongue, the Good Book says, “is a fire, the very world of iniquity.”  We are to “let no unwholesome word proceed from (our) mouth(s), but only such a word as is good for edification…that it may give grace to those who hear.”  There is to be “no filthiness, silliness, or coarse talk” among us.  We are to “put aside” abusive speech.  And we know that Jesus himself said that “the mouth speaks out of that which fills the heart.”

Speech that is written, electronically produced, reproduced, spoken, acted out, or whatever, is still speech…words…communication…and is subject to the paragraph above, in my view.  So I take the pledge, knowing I will fail, and sometimes fail miserably.  Yet I also know that the One who gave me the words above will see me through, will forgive, will enable, will still love me.  And that, my friend, is better than all the tea in China.

The Grandfather Clock

At the church building where I work, there is a grandfather clock in the library.  It was donated to the church in memory of a loved-one, and was built by hand (possibly from a kit) by the donor.  It’s a beautiful time piece and one can tell just by looking that lots of love went into the making of the clock.

I like grandfather clocks.  I don’t know why, but there seems to be a kind of magical quality about them that intrigues me.  The strikes of the chimes on the quarter hour are a source of peace to me, and the announcement of the hour brings warm feelings.  One of these days, I’m going to hopefully have one that will serve me the rest of my days and continue to serve whoever gets it after I no longer need it.

The clock had not run, however, since we started coming some six or so years ago.  I had always wondered about the clock; whether or not it was broken, why it wasn’t running, and whether I could try to get it going.  I talked with our lead preacher, who told me to go ahead and see what I could do with it.

I scooted the clock away from the wall and opened the back.  Seeing nothing to indicate anything broken or bad, I went ahead and wound it, started the pendulum, adjusted the feet of the clock so it was somewhat level, and left it.

Coming back a couple of hours later, the clock was still ticking and was keeping good time.  I put the clock back to the wall, continued with some finer adjustments through a couple of side doors to the mechanism, and set the time.  I also worked to make the chimes accurate with the time shown on the hands.

I only wish the clock would be somewhere where I could hear it through the day as I work here.  It’s in another room a couple of walls away, and there’s no way the chimes can penetrate through them.  I do, however, check in so to speak, with the clock to make sure it’s running and accurate.  I continue to tweak the pendulum speed to make it as accurate as possible.

I don’t know that there is any great life lesson in this little story.  Sometimes, things just are what they are.  Oh, I suppose I could wax eloquent about the passing of time or the love of the one who created the clock; or perhaps I could go into that old story about, “Did that clock just come together by chance, or was there a creator and designer?”  But I’m not going to do that today.  I’ll let you figure out any life lessons there may be for you, and I’m going to be satisfied with the knowledge that a grandfather clock that was silent for several years is running again and keeping time…whether anyone is in the room to hear and see it or not.  That will be enough for me.

What Do You Thnk We Should Do?

Well, I see that someone has looted and sacked the American Embassy in Libya and killed at least three people, including our ambassador.  And I imagine there will be all kinds of spiteful and even hateful comments from some of our number regarding the supposed impotence of the current administration…there always is.

I want you to know now that I do not take lightly the taking of a life, however it may happen.  The attack was abhorrent and totally unnecessary and evil.

Having said that, I also want to say that these things happen.  In my lifetime, I am guessing that an American Embassy has been attacked and on the news probably 10 times.  Other nations have had their embassies attacked as well.  It’s not a common event, but it’s also not unheard-of.  And it happens regardless of which political party is in office.  See the following website for information on attacks on Americans and American embassies.  http://www.infoplease.com/ipa/A0001454.html

I am just as concerned about things like the woman who pottied her twin girls in public in a restaurant at a table while they were eating.  http://lasvegas.cbslocal.com/2012/09/05/utah-mother-caught-potty-training-daughters-at-restaurant-dining-table/  Or the man and woman who pulled into a rest area, got out of their vehicle, and bathroomed right there in the parking area when the restroom was just a few feet away (according to my cousin, an eyewitness).

Incidents like these (and they aren’t all “potty” incidents) tell me that some among us have less than an adequate understanding of how to take care of even the basic needs of humans.  If we can’t appropriately relieve ourselves, can we really expect that we will be able to feed ourselves, house ourselves, care for our health, and raise families within the norms of society?

We live in a broken and sinful world.  We know that.  We know that things happen that are sick, abhorrent, and evil.  And the continuous news cycle of the Internet and cable TV brings home more of this kind of stuff than we really want to know and certainly much more than we used to be aware of.  Yet my guess is that things aren’t all that different from years ago…we just hear about it more often.

The wise man of the Old Testament, Solomon, said that there is nothing new under the sun.  He’s right, of course.  Those things we abhor today are the same things that have been going on (and have been abhorred by decent people) for centuries and eons.  People will always amaze us with their lack of social graces, uncouth behavior, and sinful lifestyles.  So what are we as Christians to do?

We could wring our hands and worry ourselves to death.  Or we could write vitriolic posts on Facebook and talk about how bad the current administration (whatever the political stripe is) is handling things.  We could call down fire and brimstone (so to speak) on those infidels who have done these things to us (eye for an eye).  We could talk about those who are uncouth and sinful as moronic, imbecilic, and evil.  Or we could do what Jesus said and love our enemies, do good to those who spitefully use us, love our neighbor, go the second mile, turn the other cheek, pray for those who are against us, offer a cup of cold water in His name, and go into all the world and preach the gospel.

What do you think we should do?